Thursday 18 June 2009

The Art of Mass Distraction

The BBC ‘Front Page’ news headlines today announced that the celebrity brother of actress Mia Farrow (who?) – the sculptor Patrick Farrow (another who?) - had died, aged 96, in what police described as suspicious circumstances - for a man of his age.

This Earth-shattering front page announcement will no doubt reverberate throughout the known Universe for Time Immemorial and alter the way everyday shit-for-brains peasants conceive the Divine Meaning - and Purpose - of Life and the Immortal Soul.

The BBC’s top headlines list included such philosophically-profound revelations as :

MySpace to cut staff by a third - to create more space.
NY man charged with impersonating dead mother.
Nevada senator admits having kinky affair - with goat.
Mia Farrow’s brother stops breathing – believed dead.
Economists forecast end to US recession by 2055.
Mexican Bishop chokes to death at Houston Taco Bell Chew n Spew.
South American Andes could collapse due global warming ice build-up.
Pig makes nest in Central Park tree – lays egg then flies off.

Futher newsworthy occurences made mention of Paris Hilton checking into Canterbury’s Priory Clinic - to have the scabs and spots sand-blasted off her bony arse and get her rotting snatch pressure washed.

And that, folks, was the World Headline News.

Any mention of US-made Israeli battle tanks squashing more Palestinian children in Gaza? – Nope.
Any word about how many mothers gave birth to deformed abominations in Iraq this month due ingesting air and water contaminated with depleted uranium? – Not a whisper.
An updated figure on the millions of peasants unemployed globally due the incompetent bankster-generated recession? – Nary a one.
News of arrests in the Maddy McCann kidnap case – who was snatched-to-order in Portugal and sold to Belgian Satanists for ritual sacrifice purposes? – Not a single column inch.
Any hint of what really happen to the four hijacked aeroplanes – plus passangers – on 9/11? – Not this week – and don’t hold your breath either.
Any explanation as to why the Afghan opium and rhubarb narcotic crop growers are enjoying bumper harvests in US-controlled areas of the country? – Shhhhh – don’t say a word!

Such is the pathetic state of the news since ‘parties of self-interest’ monopoly control of media was sanctioned by government regulators and not a single scintilla of objective opinion involving any semblance of truth permitted to see the light of day since.

The next great corruption came with the advent of Rubenesque boobs being published on Page Three of national dailies globally – even in the Vatican Herald and the Amish Gazette.

However, back to the headlines that perennially beguile the masses:

While Mia Farrow’s name is only significant in Satanist circles for having a baby named Rosemary, her brother Patrick, a reformed mayonaisse addict, was apparently quite well known for his art decor razor wire fences and Dali-esque hanging baskets which he exhibited free of charge on Facebook.

Funeral to be held at the Church of Latter Day Flying Spaghetti Monster in Aardvark County, Vermont. Family and close friends only – no flowers.
The Rumour Mill Press reports that Woody Allen will read the eulogy.

One item of sea change news just in : London Mayor Boris Bonkers Nonsense is facing mass protests over his plans to rip up the inner city’s curb stones in a ‘naked roads’ / ‘shared surface’ scheme that will provide car drivers with greater space and opportunity to run down dozy pedestrians and squash them against the walls of buildings.

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